Should I Be Sending My Children To Camp?
Some six million children in the United States are preparing psychologically to go away to sleepaway camp. Whether these departing children are camp veterans or nervous rookies, they are mentally rehearsing being away from mom and dad, their comfortable beds, their pets, favorite meals and, of course, their beloved iPhones, Facebook and video games.
During the winter their parents made the decision — and found the money — to make it possible for their kids to leave their families and their comfortable homes so that they could spend a week or two or four in a rustic, more-or-less uncomfortable cabin getting bitten by mosquitoes. They will live with a bunch of other kids, some of whom are fantastic, others quite annoying. They will eat a balanced diet of grilled cheese sandwiches and Fudgesicles with the occasional corn dog for good measure. They will play fun but aimless games like “Capture the Flag” and sit around campfires watching hilarious, dumb skits that almost no one remembers two days later (except the authors, of course). They will master skills such as archery and kayaking, horseback riding and waterskiing, none of which will impress their varsity coach or their AP Bio teacher when they return to school.
While the campers are messing about in the woods, many of their peers will be attending summer school or specialized skills programs. Their responsible, if sometimes Tiger-ish, moms and dads will be investing their money in their children’s future differently, sending them to one-week soccer and lacrosse programs, SAT prep courses and unpaid internships designed to polish skills, boost scores and impress college admissions officers. Instead of spending three weeks at an all-around camp, these children will be focused on skill-building, sometimes in three different specialized programs to which their parents drive them every day (allowing time for that all-important debrief in the car going home).
Which set of parents has it right? Or more to the point: Does an overnight camp experience still make sense in this competitive, resume-building world? From this psychologist’s point of view, the answer is a resounding YES. I believe that children develop in profound ways when they leave their parents’ house and join a camp community.
Learning to sleep away from home is, of course, a critical step on the way to independence. Part of the challenge is beating homesickness, which may be hard for some children, and which, by definition, your parents cannot help you do. Kids know they have to do this sooner or later. As my son once remarked with horror, “If you can’t learn to sleep away from home, you have to live with your parents for the rest of your life.” But beyond that, there are things that, as a parent, you cannot do for your children, as much as you might wish to. You cannot make them happy (if you try too hard they become whiners); you cannot give them self-esteem and confidence (those come from their own accomplishments); you cannot pick friends for them and micro-manage their social lives, and finally you cannot give them independence. The only way children can grow into independence is to have their parents open the door and let them walk out. That’s what makes camp such a life-changing experience for children.
After conducting hundreds of interviews of campers and former campers for my book, “Homesick and Happy: How Time Away from Parents Can Help a Child Grow,” I know that many young people do not really know how strong they are, how competent they are or even who they are until they get away from their parents and test themselves in a new and challenging environment. Many children told me the best thing about camp was, “I can really be myself here.” What do they mean by that? I am pretty sure I know the answer. When children are away from their parents, they do not have to view their own life and achievements through the lens of my-athlete-father-standing-on-the-sidelines-watching-me or my-mother-is-worried-that-I’ll fail. When a child is on his own, the experience is his alone, the satisfaction belongs only to him and he does not have to filter it through what his parents think and feel.
For the dedicated, loving and anxious parent, letting a child go can be tough. “Will she be happy at camp? Will he make friends? Will she be homesick?” But homesickness can often be confused with a parent’s childsickness. The director of a girls’ camp in Massachusetts tells me she has more and more parents of 9-year-olds calling to say, “Well, she’s ready for camp, but I’m not ready to have her leave.” If you want an independent child, you have to master your own childsickness. Try remembering the sweetest moments from your own childhood. Most adults tell me that the sweetest, most memorable times of their childhood were when they were away from their parents, doing something with friends in the out-of-doors, taking a challenge or doing something a bit risky. That sounds like camp to me.
By the way, when I interviewed college admissions officers about how they view campers, they say that they think former campers are more likely to succeed in college because they have had successful experiences away from home, and they are always impressed by seniors who have been counselors looking after younger children. Camp helps build confidence and identity; it also builds leadership skills.
Michael Thompson, Ph.D
2013 Camp Dates
Camp families,
I hope all is well and life is getting back to normal if you were effected by the hurricane! Because of the storm and a lot of school districts ending later this year, we have decided to push camp back 1 week. The new dates are:
- Session 1: Sunday June 30 – Saturday July 20
- Session 2: Sunday July 21 – Saturday August 10
If you have any questions please call the camp office at 866-283-5943. You can re-enroll online anytime to take advantage of our early enrollment discount.
Best,
Brian
The End Of Another Great Camp Season
I hope that all BSC campers/staff/parents had a great labor day weekend. Its hard to believe that summer is over. Looking back, both camp sessions were a huge success and with today’s technology (Facebook, Twitter, Youtube) we have outlets to talk about camp all year long. If you go to our YouTube page, you can view the final sports banquet slideshow from session 1&2. Believe it or not, we already have home visits scheduled for families interested in 2013. Please call the camp office if you would like to set something up and have a great start to the school year!
Koop
Camp Inspiration: Look Who Went To Camp
Great things happen when youth and mountains meet . . .
and when they meet at camp something extraordinary happens
For the 150 years that camp has been part of the hearts and minds of children and parents, this great experience–called camp–has provided important steps toward the milestones of their young lives–creating and fostering the artist, the musician, the articulate business person, the inspired politician, the actor, the scientist, or the visionary who lives in each child’s heart.
From a society designed just for children springs forth millions of children from a wide range of backgrounds and experiences . . . every child’s camp experience is part of the story of their lives.
The following list of famed campers might have taken an inkling of camp into their inspired work:
Business
Michael Eisner, former CEO, Disney Corporation
F. Martin Johnson, former CEO/president, JSJ Corporation
Michael M. Kaiser, president, The John F. Kennedy Center for the Performing Arts
Frank Kelly Jr., former vice president, American Express, Inc.
Sherry Lansing, former CEO, Paramount Pictures
Lawrence Page, co-founder & president, products, Google Corporation
Frank Smith, president, FedEx
Martha Stewart, Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia
Ralph Lauren, designer & founder, Ralph Lauren Company
Science
Albert Einstein (staff), scientist
Richard Kurin, Cultural Anthropologist
Jerry Linenger, NASA Space Shuttle Astronaut
Sally Ride, NASA Space Shuttle Astronaut
Civic and Political Leaders
Prince Albert of Monaco
George W. Bush, 46th President, United States
Chelsea Clinton, daughter Bill and Hillary Clinton
Colby Cooper, Senior Advisor to U.S. Secretary of State
Grey Davis, former governor of California
Gerald Ford, 38th President, United States
Ruth Bader Ginsberg, Supreme Court Justice
Dexter Scott King, son of Martin Luther King, Jr.
Bernice Albertine King, daughter of Martin Luther King, Jr. Martin Luther King III, son of Martin Luther King, Jr. Yolanda Denise King, daughter of Martin Luther King, Jr.
Carl Levin, U.S. Senate
Ronald E. Minsk, former Special Assistant to the President for Economic Policy at the National Economic Council (Clinton Administration) and New York Times Op-Ed Author
Sandra Day O’Conner, retired Supreme Court Justice
Michelle Obama (staff), First Lady of the United States and Wife of the 44th President, Barack Obama
Elma Powell, wife of Colin Powell, U.S. Army General (ret.) and former U.S. Secretary of State
Nancy Reagan, wife of former president Ronald Reagan
Condoleezza Rice, U.S. Secretary of State
Ann Richards, former governor of Texas
Bob Riley, Governor, Alabama
Katherine Schwarzenegger, author and daughter of Governor Schwarzenegger and Maria Shriver
Music
Clay Aiken, singer
Marin Alsop, composter and music director of the Baltimore Symphony Orchestra
Zac Brown (staff), country music artist
Neil Diamond, singer
Bob Dylan, singer and songwriter
Josh Groban, singer
Bruce Johnston, The Beach Boys
Norah Jones, singer and pianist
Jewel Kilcher, singer
Damian Kulash, guitarist for OK Go
Jerry Leiber & Mike Stoller, songwriters, Smokey Joe’s Café
Lisa Loeb, singer, musician, and songwriter
Arthur Loesser, pianist and composer
Lorin Maazel, musical director, New York Philharmonic
Jeff Marks, creator, Tony Award winning Avenue Q
Bret Michaels, singer
Tim Mitchell, guitarist
Timothy J. Nordwind, bassist for OK Go
Douglas Pipes, composer
Richard Rodgers, composer
Peter Seeger, folk singer, musician, song writer
Gwen Stefani, singer
Frank Tichelli, composer
Dar Williams, singer
Peter Yarrow, singer for Peter, Paul and Mary
Visual Arts
Sam Abell, photographer
Robert Snyder, artist
Performing Arts
Paul Adelstein, actor
Kirstie Alley, actor
Jennifer Beals, actor
Mischa Barton, actor
Meredith Baxter, actor
Mike Bender, writer and director, Indian Summer
Zach Braff, actor and director
Richard Brooks, actor
Drew Carey (staff), actor and comedian
George Carlin, comedian and actor
Justin Chambers, actor
Chevy Chase, actor and comedian
Andy Cohen, television executive and host
Courteney Cox, actor
John Cryer, actor
Matt Damon, actor, writer, and producer
Michael DeLorenzo, actor, director, and composer
Leonardo DiCaprio, actor
Robert Downey, Jr., actor
Avner Eisenberg, actor
Tovah Feldshuh, actor
Hill Harper, actor
Ed Helms, actor
Bryce Dallas Howard, actor
Lauren Holly, actor
Felicity Huffman, actor
Tom Hulce, actor
Linda Hunt, actor
Jennifer Jason Lee, actor
Keira Knightley, actor
John Krasinski, actor
Sharon Lawrence, actor and environmentalist
Susan Lucci, actor
John C. McGinley, actor
Mandy Moore, actor
Dermot Mulroney, actor
Paul Newman, actor
James Pickens, Jr., actor and equestrian
Natalie Portman, actor
Gilda Radner, comedian
Anthony Rapp, actor
LisaRaye McCoy, actor
Emma Roberts, actor
Julia Roberts, actor
Rita Rudner, comedian
Rosalind Russell, actor
Todd Schulman, producer
Trish Sie, director and choreographer for OK Go
Marlo Thomas, actor, author, and spokesperson
Glynn Turman, actor, director, and producer
Blair Underwood, actor and director
Matt Winston, actor
Stan Winston , Academy Award winning director, special effects, and make up
Reese Witherspoon, actor
Sports
Drew Brees, Super Bowl MVP
Jerry Burns, former head coach, Minnesota Vikings
Steve Fisher, basketball coach, San Diego State University
Dorothy Hamill, Olympic Gold Medalist, Figure Skating
Robert Hollway, former coach, St. Louis Cardinals and former assistant coach, Minnesota Vikings
Joe Jacobi, Olympic Gold Medalist, Kayaking
Jerry Richardson, Carolina Panthers majority owner, Hardee’s cofounder, and former Baltimore Colts wide receiver
Kerri Strug, Olympic Gold Medialist, Gymnastics
Authors
Sam Abell, author
Margaret Atwood, author
Dave Barry, humor writer
David Brooks, author and commentator
Rita Dove, poet
Eli Evans, author and member of the National Academy of Arts and Science
Kinky Friedman, author, humorist, musician, and most recently a candidate for Governor of Texas, 2006.
Seth Godin, author of Tribes and entrepreneur
Cathy Guisewite, creator, comic strip Cathy
John McPhee, Pulizter Prize winning author
J.D. Salinger, author
Michael G. Thompson, PhD, author
Andrew Tobias, journalist and author
Jill Wheeler, author
Mitch Zuckoff, author
Journalists
David Blum
Rita Braver
Pat Carbine
Tucker Carlson
Katie Couric
Nancy Gibbs
Ashlan Gorse
Michael Reagan
Frank Sesno
Dr. Nancy Snyderman
Jeffrey Taylor
Mike Wallace
Monday Update
Today was give it your all… This was our last time for intensive instruction in our majors. Two times today we took full advantage of all our coaches had to offer. There were numerous shout outs and lot’s of applauding during line up. Coaches announced so many achievements, improvements, and effort made by campers.
For evening activity our rookies went to Wigwam for kickball and Wigwam came here for ultimate freezbie. Afterwords we had a chance to catch up on the Olympics in the players lounge.
Tomorrow we will be going to Fun Town Splash Town. This is a trip that we all look forward to all summer! Shortly color war will break. We will be having our own Olympics here at Bridgton
Lazy Bones Sunday
Our last Lazy Bones Sunday was jammed packed and not so lazy! Practically the entire camp was in the gym by 9:45. When Camp Wildwood came we could tell they were on a mission. We played hard, made great shots, but are defense was not as strong today. We were down by only 3 point with seconds to go. We just couldn’t pull it off. Final score 28-35. The bleachers were rocking and it was great to hear our fellow campers yelling, cheering and stomping their feet.
Directly after rest hour we had our lax match with Windham. We couldn’t have played any better. We won 11-5. The boys were well coached and worked really hard. We’re proud of the way they played they looked awesome out there on the field. Forgot to mention the keeper was a rookie!!!
Next the rookies had paintball and the professionals had wiffle ball with slip and slide from 3rd. base to home plate. We’ve opted for a lazy bones evening. Chilling in the players lounge and catching up on the Olympics.
Wednesday Update
We had some big winners last evening. Casino night is always a big hit with the campers. A lot of them dressed for the occasion and looked pretty cool. They could try their luck at blackjack, war, car roulette, rock paper scissors, or the high rollers went to the private lounge up stairs for poker and high stakes blackjack. Our cocktail waitresses were serving popcorn and power drinks. We also had a cotton candy machine and snow cones. A disc jockey supplied the music, and there were bouncers at the door. I THINK WE HAD ALL BASES COVERED.
A beautiful day in Maine. Blue skies not a drop of humidity and temps in the upper 70’s. I watched wiffle ball on one field and flag football on another making a quick stop in the fitness room. There was even king of the court going on at tennis. A lot of camper’s were down on the waterfront wake boarding or skiing. Campers seem to be taking full advantage of all the different activities when they’re not at their majors.
A shortened rest hour for the 13 and under basketball team. We hosted Wigwam on our home court. Our team was unbeatable. The campers were rooting them on throughout the entire game. Final score BSC 31 Wigwam 25. This was one of the best games I’ve seen here.
At 3:00 pm we boarded the buses that took us to the Seadogs game in Portland. Rumor has it there will be fireworks after the game. Will let you know tomorrow.
Monday Update
What a day!!!! The morning was our major and a minor. I watched all the majors today. Each sport does a series of stretches then drills. There is plenty of instruction always with a demonstration first. Then they usually break down into smaller groups and work on what they’re being taught. Be proud… they are really working hard. More that one coach has commented on what a good job they’re dong.
BRIDGE WHAT???? Our soccer team came back from intercamp with a 9-1 victory. The boys played like they’ve been a team for months. They all stood during line up and Dillon told us how each camper contributed to the match. They could hear us cheering all the way to Naples! We are so proud of them!!!!!
Dinner was build your own tacco. With apple pie for desert. Our flag football team ate a little before us, and left for Camp Indian Acres. The dinning room was unusually quiet with out them. We are all patiently waiting for a score.
Sunday Update
Some of the boys really took advantage of Lazy Bones Sunday. Others could be found playing tennis or in the dinning hall watching ESPN having Dunkin Donuts. Most boys I talked to said, it was great to catch up on a little sleep.
For lunch Chef Chris put out turkey, ham, cheese, tuna fish, egg salad, lettuce and tomatoes. We had rolls, wraps, whole wheat or white bread to make our sandwich on. It was quite a decision trying to decide what bread to use :))) Some of the sandwiches were very creative. Speaking of being creative….. We are quite anxious to see the tie die projects that were done this past week in arts & crafts. Rumor has it we’re going to see some tie dyed shorts, as well as socks, pillowcases & tee shirts.
In the afternoon there was a change in regular schedule. Campers had the opportunity to have paintball, wiffle ball with a slip and slide to home plate, broom-ball on the ice, and a kickball game. All of these activities are very popular with the boys. Every body survived paintball except Big Steve and X. They looked like they were moving targets for the campers.
Tomorrow in addition to regular activities we have a13 and under soccer tournament at Camp Wigwam. After dinner 15 & Under flag football at Camp Indian Acres.
First week wrap up
The first week of camp went by so fast. Campers are now acclimated to camp life. It’s nice to see the camaraderie and camp spirit that is developing only after a week.
This past week was devoted to our majors and minors. Campers received much instruction and had drills to implement what they were learning. This will continue. In addition we will be hosting other camps, and traveling to their camps during week two. All sports with different ages will have games this week. I will keep you posted.
A pizza party for dinner and now movie night. Showing two different movies in the humanities center.
Tomorrow is LAZY BONES SUNDAY. A buffet breakfast served from 9 till 10:30.
